When I say that we've looked high, low, and everywhere in between for a Bob the Builder Halloween costume, I really mean it. We've been looking for a month, and there is nary a Bob to be found. Considering that "Hit Entertainment" seems to be spewing out Bob videos at a rate of one per month, still, I wonder, WTF? From what I hear, mine is far from the only disappointed little guy out there. The stores' responses are always: We have "Handy Manny." Well, my kid doesn't even know who Handy Manny is. We don't really watch TV anymore. (Mama got sick of the "I want I want I want I want" that seemed to accompany each TV advertisement.) We watch videos. Bob the Builder videos. We own ten. We need a Bob costume, yesterday.
I could order the costume on-line, but they're nearly $50 and wouldn't get here in time for his preschool's fall carnival on Sunday. They also vary widely in size, and he's almost 4 but little -- so what size do I order? Thinking on my feet, I realized that we have a Bob helmet and toolbelt; maybe I could talk him into those things being the costume. When I dressed him in overalls and a red shirt, Dash made the astute point that Bob's shirt is orange and red, and Bob's overalls are more blue. I showed him how I could stick orange squares on his red shirt. His response? "That's not real."
Hit Entertainment, this mom thinks you suck. WHY did you have to make the character's shirt orange and red checked? Do you think the kids would love him less if his shirt were solid orange? red? or a normal plaid? By crafting Bob the way you did, you've backed us moms into a corner: quilt a shirt, or disappoint a kid. I don't sew. And my kid is not backing down. Something's got to give, and it might be the Bob videos, which might suddenly disappear. He likes Popular Mechanics for Kids more, anyway.
Meanwhile, I'm trying to get Dash to change his mind, something I don't like to do because of its near-impossibility. He tried on an awesome policeman costume today. It wasn't "real" either -- his complaint for that one being the sewn-on eight-pack abs. If I every saw a policeman who looked that ripped through his shirt, I'd... well, I'd be in trouble with the Guv. I thought maybe he could be what he calls "an Army guy," but I don't want him toting a gun and fake-killing people, and the two are inseparable to his three year-old mind. He wants to be a fireman, maybe, but only in a red suit that's not plastic.
Back in my day, my grandma would sew my Halloween costume. I remember being a bride, a Pilgrim, a clown... I don't remember these plasticized un-real costumes. Petunia will be a witch this year, but not an old-school witch -- an American Idol-style "young lady you have to wear a leotard under that you can't bare your belly" kind of witch. And then there's Dash. I'm off to check another few stores for Bob, because I don't want him to go as Disappointed Kid, which is how this is all probably going to end. Me, I'm thinking of going as Joe Sixpack. Forgive me if the cans are empty; this Halloween has done me in!