... but I'm going to tell you because it's kind of funny, if you're not me. I'm sitting with a heating pad under my unbelievably sore hamstrings, attached to a nebulizer, and contemplating whether or not the Guv will kick me out of bed if I rub Ben Gay on my pecs.
So the good news is that I've been cleared to exercise, and I've made good on the necessary promise to make my health my #1 priority. If my body is stronger, I stand less chance of getting sick to begin with -- and, if I do get sick, stand a better chance of coming through it less scarred. At the end of the day, my lungs aren't ever going to be perfect again (really, it's "lung," just my left one), so I have to do what I can to keep things from getting worse. Thus, I've embarked on my journey to become Rox: Strong as an Ox.
I joined a local gym and hired a trainer who apparently knows more ways to kill me than I know how to die. OMG, I've never been this hurt in my life. And one might say, "oh, but it hurts so good," but no, no, no, it doesn't hurt so good, it hurts badly. The first session, it was my quads and my butt that couldn't function for two days; this week, it's my hamstrings, pecs, and deltoids. Ouch, ouch, ouch. The Guv keeps telling me, "it'll get easier," but I think I might die first, and the whole point of this exercise is not dying, right? RIGHT?
But I did it to myself. She said five pull-ups, I gave her ten. She said ten pushups, I did twenty. She threw a 20-pound medicine ball at me, and I caught it, then dropped it. (That thing was too heavy for playing catch!) If I tell her ten pound weights are good, next time, she doubles it. Evil Trainer Woman gets it: I feel like I'm fighting for my life, so I need to become Rocky Rox Balboa. (I would say Roxy, but the last person who called me that is missing her teeth.)
So I'll see Helga the Dominatrix Trainer every week, and, in between, I'll kickbox and do yoga and try suspension training and boot camp. This way, I can both stay healthy and beat up people who piss me off. It's a win-win, no?
Meanwhile, I have posts about The White House Project at BlogHer, and about BlogHer10 itself, and about the BlogHer parties, and the people, and New York, and life lined up ... I'm also launching Rox on a Soapbox (political punditry!) and Good Stuff Rox (reviews and giveaways!) soon, so prepare to be even more entertained.
'Til then, like Sisyphus, I'll just keep pushing this Rox up that hill. Stay tuned for two more movie giveaways this week, and a lot more great things to come!
P.S. I love Ben Gay so much I'd like to marry it.